Buckets. Fun things, buckets. Very easy to apply metaphors to, aren't they?
So what is the Bucket Metaphor of this week? That of Tim Rath's that basically says you have this metaphorical bucket that you want to fill with non-metaphorical good feelings so that the metaphorical dipper doesn't metaphorically empty your metaphorical bucket to leave non-metaphorical bad feelings.
Buckets. Metaphors. They just go hand-in-hand.
But how do you make this metaphor a reality? (I'm actually really proud of that segue. Just saying.)
1) Shine a light on what's right: Focus on a person's strengths instead of their weaknesses. Instead of highlighting what someone did wrong, praise what someone did right.
For example, if three different students each came home with different grades--an A, C, and F respectively--which student would warrant the most attention? In America especially, most would answer the F. But what this rule is saying is that maybe, just maybe, focusing on the A would be most beneficial.
I like this one. I lived this one. I'm really bad as science and math and things like that (I'm a writer, what do you want from me?) and so my grades in those subjects a while ago weren't as high as my mom would've liked. They weren't terrible, but I could've done better. My mom wasted no time letting me know that. Every. Single. Day. Eventually I got so tired of it, I just didn't want to even try in those classes anymore. Finally I just told her to stop nagging me about my bad grades (not in those exact words, but you get the idea). I came home and told her all the good test grades I got and you know what? My grades got better. Go figure.
2) Give unexpectedly: That pretty much says it all, right? Christmas and birthdays aren't the only days people like being given things, and when they come out of the blue that just makes those things infinitely better.
In the workplace, for example, giving someone more responsibility makes them feel good, especially when they don't expect it (although a day or two of warning might be nice, you don't want to stress them out).
This happens to me in newspaper a lot, actually. When my advisor asks me to do something, like type out the budget, I don't know why but it makes me feel good. I feel like, in his eyes, I am trustworthy enough to do something like that.
3) Reverse the Golden Rule: I don't remember Tim Rath's exact words, but basically this is saying that what fills your bucket won't necessarily fill someone else's.
Tim Rath brought up an example of a man who was given a plaque as an award for being the best employee every year by a woman who loved being given plaques. The man freaked out one year and absolutely refused to accept the plaque. The next year, after extensive research, the woman presented the man with a portrait of his two daughters as a reward for his hard work. And you know what? He liked it.
Well in my life . . . I'm not sure this ever happened to me. Hm. I might like a plaque though.
There are five steps according to Tim Rath, but these three happened to be the ones I liked the most. I like being praised and being given things, especially things that pertain to me personally. But I tend to fill other people's buckets more than my own. I dip that one way too much.
